About 2 weeks ago I was sitting in traffic court for a speeding ticket and listening to the judge tell us what was about to happen. As she was explaining how you could plead guilty or not guilty or no contest (meaning you’re not saying you did anything but you’re not saying you didn’t do anything either), I began to think about what that really meant. I suppose I could walk up there and say no contest but it doesn’t change the fact that I was speeding. Then I thought, “What if I just say guilty? Why not? I was speeding and she might even give me a reduced fine or something.”
Name after name was called and I heard everyone saying no contest. I realized that I had to plead guilty. Not because I was hoping she would reduce my fine but because I did it; I was speeding. No matter how I try and justify it in my mind I was in the wrong. There is no saying “I wasn’t going as fast as the guy you didn’t pull over” or “look at the good I was doing that week” and definitely no making excuses like “I was late for an all staff meeting.” All I could say is, “Guilty, I did it.”
That made me think of things in my everyday life that I was guilty of. Had I truly owned up to them and said I’m guilty? Have I been making excuses about why I do the things I do? If I don’t own up to my guilt then I really don’t want to change and to make things better. When I acknowledge my guilt and accept the fact that I am guilty I can start to change and get better. There is no one to blame, just me. There are no excuses.
So today I acknowledge I’m guilty of:
Not always being the best husband I could be
Not always being the best father I could be
Not always being the best co-worker I could be
Not always encouraging others
Not always listening to the Spirit of God
See, I could say that comparatively I’m better than most or make excuses but the truth is there are no excuses. I’m just guilty. I am thankful for a Loving, Merciful God that forgives.
Now that I know I’m guilty, I can actually work towards the a goal of getting better in the areas that I’m guilty of and not just live a life of excuses.